i knew this guy in middle school who when asked about his future plans, even by school counselors or teachers would without fail always chant,
KICK ASS, GO TO SPACE
REPRESENT THE HUMAN RACE
i wonder what he’s up to these days.
yeah i play an instrument [lifts up shirt and smacks stomach]
SO HELP ME GOD YOU LITTLE SHITS BETTER USE FAFSA.GOV TO FILL OUT YOUR FUCKING FAFSA.
IF YOU PAY $88 TO FILE YOUR FAFSA AT FAFSA.COM, I WILL SMACK THE DUMB LOOK RIGHT OFF YOUR DAMN FACES. FAFSA.COM IS NOT AFFILIATED WITH THE US DEPARTMENT OF ED. THEY ARE BAD PEOPLE WHO WILL TAKE YOUR MONEY AND CHARGE YOU TO FILL OUT A FREE FORM. A FREE FUCKING FORM. FREE IS THE FIRST WORD IN THE ACRONYM!
.GOV IS LOVE. .COM IS A PUTRID POOL OF FUCKERY.
-THE VERY ANGRY SUDDEN ADULT
Things I didn’t catch on the first viewing
My friend asked me to walk down the stairs while he filmed me and it was the best decision I made all month.
I guess that settles that argument
Captain America wears Calvin Klein
only in fandom.
Asking the real questions
sex is a lot like a hot bath
once you get your balls in the worst part’s over and you can get your torso and arms and stuff in
i’ve never had sex
my drug dealer cracks me up